I hope this photo doesn’t give anyone nightmares

Jeremy Scott did a line for this whole Barbie debacle that is infiltrating a bunch of grown folks lives. I was at Fred Segal for my friend Claudia’s pop-up shop. She was talking. I was pretending to listen. Because behind her were these LEGGINGS.. These Barbie print leggings pictured on either side of the scary face above. It was like they were calling me like how the TV talked to that weird lil girl in the Poltergeist. I feel like they need me. But I have no idea what I plan to wear with them or where I plan to wear them without being judged….

Oh and yes, there is also a BODYSUIT.

Discuss….

Wisteria Lane is about to get MAD Jersey…

Holy shit you guys! Drea de Matteo is joining the cast of Desperate Housewives next season. The Daily News reports that she will play the matriarch of (giant shock) an Italian family that moves down the block with her “contractor” husband.  Since we are talking about it, I am also looking for a “contractor” to call my own. Since my new goal in life is to become a Housewife of New Jersey.

Now they need to replace ALL the other boring characters on Desperate Housewives and we should be good to go!

Off color t-shirts to commemorate the Oxy Clean guy!

Our friends’s at snowboarding site Yobeat.com made this. I think this is in response to this off colored Michael Jackson t-shirt. But snowboarder’s like snow and Oxy Clean and other white people stuff. Like white people! So go buy a t-shirt and see if Brooke actually made them or not. Then tell her she owes me money.

SADFACE

Neither Solange nor Solange’s vagina look very good in her Rainbow Brite/M.I.A costume

The new rape whistle

Not only is this the awesomest looking girlie defense option out there, the Mace people say this is the most precise of any of their pepper spray products. Nothing says bad-ass Barbie, like pulling a pink pepper spray gun on a potential bad guy…or you know…exboyfriend?

Would you never?

Sadface, someone thought it would be a good idea to combine gladiator sandals with sneakers. Then they decided to market them to the street wear girl set. Brightside? There is finally another genre of shoes i want even less than gladiator sandals. And these would be them!

Lindsay Lohan turns 23. Wears weirdest outfit ever.

Lindsay Lohan had a birthday party to celebrate her 23 years of life and maybe her leggings line, from the looks of the signary. She appears to have chosen to build her strange outfit around her belly button ring. Admirable, yet completely unnerving…

FLATS!

I am not good at “flats.” My shoe collection is 70 percent four inch heels, 15 percent sneakers, and 15 percent boots. I would like to own flats. But they are generally boring looking or weird or are Gladiator sandals. These are ALMOST cute. I would even have ALMOST bought them if they hadn’t been 395 pounds, which when translated to “English” comes out to way more than 395 dollars. In my mind “flats” are like 1/10 of a regular shoe and therefore should cost such.

So back to my impractical footwear collection it is!

Another dilema not solved by the mysterious “internet.”

I still don’t get Lady Gaga

Here is her new mini-movie/video  for her newest single “Paprazzi.” In the 8 minutes, I DID learn that doing dudes on a balcony is NOT safe, no matter how sexy the circumstances. What I did NOT learn is just about everything else I don’t understand about Lady Gaga. I still don’t get if she is trying to be some sort of sex symbol or if she is actually into dudes? Nor do i fully understand what kind of music this is.

But I don’t ever really understand anything fully. Since in general, nothing ever makes any sense.

Check out the Nylon TV Volcom denim challenge

I liked Jared’s jacket the best. But that’s only cause he’s gotten drunk and tried to make out with me a bunch. All the jackets are on display at the Volcom store at 126 S La Brea if you want to go check them outz.